Asylum Walk (23)

“Brain Blanket Bingo”

You know you’ve been a psych patient too long when...

1. Your former psychiatrist (not your first) dies of old age.
2. Drinking red wine before dinner, you catch yourself saying, “It’s not a mood stabilizer so much as a brain blanket.”
3. “How’s your libido on the new dosage?” sounds as normal (and as interesting) as “How about those Leafs?”
4. Somebody talking about an 80s band stops and says, “Oh, that’s the decade you missed, right?” (You haven’t told her yet about the 70s.)
5. Mental states are classed as Friendly, Hostile and Non-aligned.
6. Your hands flutter and your eyelids seize.
7. Your pill-cutter needs a new blade.